Sunday, December 6, 2009

First Presidency Christmas Devotional

I was able to talk with Aaron just for a little bit this afternoon, he was calling to let me know he would be going to break the fast and than to listen to the First Presidency Christmas Devotional. As I was thinking about our 11 years together it occured to me that, we went to the First Presidency Christmas Devotional together. It was I want to say like our first date.
So we were talking about our first year at Ricks and how Aaron almost did not come back for the 2 term, and how different our lives would be if he would have not decided to stay. I am so very grateful that he did. He has made my life so much better. We have two wonderful little boys with one more on the way.
I am glad that the both of us are able to listen to this years First Presidency Christmas Devotional, we may not be together but we are still able to hear the message. I am getting the boys ready right now to sit down and listen to the message. We are so very blessed to have the gospel be the same where every you live. What a wonderful thing to have.
Aaron and I have learned so much during these 9 months that we have been away from one another. We have learned how much each one of us means, how much we truly do work as a team and how we depend on one another. The past 9 months have not been easy by any means for our little family. The boys truly miss their Dad and how he plays and loves them. He misses them as well, I told Kodi today that he is a just like Daddy and I thanked him for giving me hugs so I can feel Daddy's love and Kodi's love.
We are blessed to know that our family is forever and that we will always be together, whether we are apart or together. We are blessed to have these past two months go very fast. I am still not looking forward to being a "single parent" while Aaron is in training, but with the Lords help and prayers from our family and friends, we will be just fine. Both Aaron and I can feel the prayers and we thank you for them.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Let it Snow!

Winter finally made it's way here, we woke up to snow, it was not a lot but enough to really stick but both boys thought it was pretty cool. Pa also put up a Santa in the front window last night, and when the boys woke up it was a pretty cool surprise.
When I was little we had a house elf that came and left us little gifts during the month of December, well now that I have kids he has decided to come and do the same thing for my boys. Kodi really gets into trying to see Nutmeg and will find his footprints around the house. We love when Nutmeg comes to visit us. Kingston is not sure really who Nutmeg is, but still like the toys he brings. Each boy got a new stocking and a toy, Kodi got two ornaments to paint and Kingston got a ball that lights up. Both were a Huge hit, of course they had to understand that Nutmeg only comes when they are going good, and listening to us.
It's the beginning of our weekend, and I am actually looking forward to this coming week. It was suppose to be our Huge Family trip to Disney world, but because of Peyton we ended up going in October and the rest of my family is getting ready to leave on Sunday, which means it will just be me and the boys. I love my parents for letting us living with them, but it's not us and it's not always how we work. So this next week it will just be us, I can't wait. The boys and I do very well being just the three of us. Than two weeks after that Aaron should be coming home for Peyton to be born and Christmas.
Kingston is not liking the fact that I am putting my foot down when he is starting to act up, but I have to nip it in the butt now before Peyton comes. He is starting to understand that the No hitting rule will get him a spot on the stool for time out.
Dakota is also seeing that I am putting my foot down with him as well, and did very well with the No TV rule in the morning, we will see how well he does with that tomorrow, but this morning was a great morning. I have been praying lately that Kodi and I have better morning, he is pushing all my buttons and getting me very upset very fast which is not good for me or Kodi.
The Lord is blessing me with better patience and as I was listening last night after my prayer I was flooded with ideas on how to make our days go better with Kodi and I am so very grateful for the Lord and being able to talk with him and tell him my problems and concerns. We are so blessed to know that he will never stop listening to us.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Families what can I say! Warning letting some steam off.

I can not believe that the Christmas Season is here. My boys have been watching a lot of Santa movies, Kingston loves Santa and Kodi is at that age asking for EVERYTHING he sees on TV.
Last night was our Christmas Relief Society Party, it was a lot of fun, and a very good time. Kodi and I did not get home until almost 10 after cleaning up and making sure everything was good for us to leave the building. They ladies in our committee won't let me do a lot since I am about ready to pop. So I just helped in any way I could.
This is my favorite time of year, as most peoples, not because of the presents and Santa, but because for me it is a time that my family is together, we pull together and make our own memories. This year will be a different one, for we always spend Christmas Eve with my Dad and two wonderful young brother and sister I have to say I am not happy at all with the choices my "Father" is making, it was hard growing up and being up on the back burner and having to deal with not being important at all. The three of us have learned that if we want him in our lives it's us making the calls for him to come over not him. It's very hard to sit back and which him start to make those mistakes again the big sister wants to protect them from getting hurt. My Father informed us that he will not be around for the holidays and will be out in Idaho with his new girlfriend, spending that time with her. Of course he wanted Tara to call the siblings and let her tell the bad news. The part that is one of the hardest is that he is drinking again, I truly believe he thinks we have no idea that he is drinking, but when he continues to call us all the time telling us the same things over and over again is sad. At first I did not mind talking to him, and now I just get very upset, my poor sister, is the one who he has been calling 5 or more times a day to talk to her, and doesn't have a clue that he has already told her everything.
I pray each day that he will get a clue and stop what he is doing, but I also know that it's a choice he is making. The little girl in me wants to him to stop and becoming a wonderful father to Eli and Ashley and not have them feel those feelings as I do, but I can only pray for him.
It also makes me so very mad that his new girlfriend HAS no IDEA this is a problem, she just thinks he is inactive member and that she is going to reactive him. She has no idea that he is an Alcoholic and that when he is not in Idaho with her he is at home drinking. She thinks we have this GREAT relationship with him, let me tell you I have never had a great relationship with my Father. When I think of what a father should be it's not my dad that I think but of my step dad and how he is always here for me and my boys. He may not agree with our choices but he is always willing to help us out and loves us so very much.
At times I truly hate being a grown up and the decision that comes with it. It truly does sadden me that he is throwing his life away to drinking. He has 7 soon to be 8 wonderful grandchildren who love him and he has 5 wonderful kids. Who do need him.
This year we will be spending Christmas Eve with Eli and Ashley, at Tara's house and making a very good memory with them. I am so very blessed to have them in my life as my brother and sister.